I don't have any fun photos to share this time, but I would have had some if I'd taken the camera with me to the yard today. Imagine this - two mostly naked babies, playing in a tub of water in the grass. That happy image would heal what ails you, at least it did for me.
This morning I was in a bad place. Not feeling the best physically (had a stomach virus over the weekend that still has me a little weak feeling) and trying to hold it together emotionally. That didn't exactly work, and twice I ended up falling onto my bed in tears and frustration, to "take a little break" as Finn calls it when he heads to his bed to shed some tears. I cried a little bit, looked at my kids, and tried again. Then I became frustrated and overwhelmed all over again and repeated the cycle. I had plans to try to get out of the house, and do a little shopping for a few things that we need. Instead, I gave up on it and made some sandwiches. We ate and then stepped out onto the porch. Something was telling me that if I could just get outside I would feel better.
We sat on the porch for a while, and the sun warmed my bare arms. The recycling truck came by and Finn jumped with joy and waved and said "thank you!" as it took away our recycling. Finn got the recycling tub and brought it back to the porch, it was filthy. So we gathered rags and soap and took it to the side of the house, put it under the spigot, and began the process. If you have ever played with a toddler, you know where this is going - naked! Inside the tub! Splashing! Jumping out and rolling in the grass! And if you have played with a baby, you could guess about Evelyn, too - wanting to be like brother! Naked! Inside the tub! etc, etc.
Watching those two play while I sat on the grass and soaked up the sun just warmed my heart right up. It dried out the seemingly endless well of sadness and despair, and brought joy to me. I remembered the blessings in my life - two happy and healthy children, a home, running water, warm sun and soft grass. And it definitely cured all that ailed me.
Have you been surprised by the way a day turned around? What cures your ailments?
7 comments:
Jess, this is lovely,better than an actual photo.
You write so beautifully.
I have to work on a project of some kind usually to turn my low spirits around. I especially like working on embroidery. It just gives me time to quietly think and reflect while I work at the same time.
Play. Maybe that "should" have been my word of the year...but I have been noticing, as it seems you did, that when I engage in play, specifically when I'm depressed, grouchy, whatever...that the mood lifts. Thank GOD I have kids to help me play. Thanks for writing this!
I too remind myself to be grateful for simple things like food on the table, warm beds, healthy kids, and double-ply toilet paper.
Seems like most problems are only half as bed in the spring sunshine.
I can relate directly to the feelings you describe. For me, there are any number of healings that can take place--many, in the the midst of a crying-ranting-fit while driving to or from work. :) I must look crazy to the other drivers, all snotty and emotional. Sometimes the very act of speaking (or writing!) a set of feelings brings the needed perspective. Sometimes, it is the sun. Sometimes, it is an episode of "No Reservations" with Anthony Bourdain walking the streets of Haiti that brings awareness to all of my (amazing? sickening?) blessings. Mostly, it is knowing I'm not alone; it is being able to share my state with someone who listens, nods and if he/she is within arm's length, maybe strokes my hair. Which, if I was close enough to you, is exactly what I would do. :)
What a great turn around to your day. Being outside is always a turn around for me. Remembering the blessings as well.
Thanks for visiting me at my blog. Have fun making your daily rhythm chart! And if you blog about it leave me a link. I'd love to see it!
Becca
i wish swimming naked in a back yard was an appropriate way for adults to chill out! that would lighten anyone's day.
i've got to agree with lainey - if only it were okay to go for a naked romp in the yard with suds & a bucket to cheer ourselves up.
i find that outside tends to heal my soul, but for some stupid reason, i tend to stay inside. maybe i'm enjoying my sulk & don't really want to feel better sometimes.
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