a silent check-mark

I don't want to leave anyone hanging about the cake, so here goes: I did not bake myself a birthday cake this year! I might still, you know, for my birthday week.
Yesterday was my birthday and between 8:30 - 8:45am my dear friend Rachel brought me a banana coffee cake. That's right! Cake before 9am! That's my kind of a day. Then, closer to 9:30am my sis-in-law Lindsay brought over a bread pudding that her husband made. She put it into bowls, drizzled the icing on top, and stuck a candle in it. She sat our boys down at the table and everyone sang (as well as toddlers can) "Happy Birthday" to me.
The rest of the day passed uneventfully but wonderfully so. I met with a group of women I'm getting to know. All the kids played noisily in Grace's house while us moms sat in the living room chatting and helping the occasional kid with getting into a costume or peeling a tangerine. That evening I was having a terrible sinus headache and didn't want to cook, so we ordered pizza from my favorite place. Scott brought it home with an armful of flowers.

The facebook birthday wishes came rolling in and I felt well-liked and grateful for many good friends in my life. I truly feel different. Just a little older, somewhat wiser. It feels like a silent check-mark, or the gentle flutter of a book page. I am becoming more accepting of myself. I am experiencing the world in a calm, appreciative way. I am learning to be aware, content, and joyful.

I just feel grateful to have made it this far!
I've lived my share of darkness and self-medication, and I'm happily learning new ways to get along in this world. May this year be a wonderful year of growth and light for you as well as for me.


Anonymous said...

Happy belated birthday, Jess! Is that a Pema Chodron book in the last photo?

natalie said...

:) i love you dearly!

SherilinR said...

wow, cake before 9am? rachel's good!

Jamie Lee said...

"It feels like a silent check-mark, or the gentle flutter of a book page."

So beautiful!! And so precisely right on. I adore this line. It's my new favorite.

And how crappy that we were both sick on our birthdays this year!! BOO

I love you, dearest. Happy Birthday! I'm grateful you were born into this life with me.

Lainey Seyler said...

happy birthday! sounds like you're starting the new year out right. much love from nebraska.

Anonymous said...

What a lovely post! I enjoy reading your word-craft. :) I'm just sorry I didn't have time to sit and enjoy that cake with you! If you do decide to go full-out birthday cake, save me a slice! xo